These days I am bound to think about the feeing which keeps on banging the doors of my mind, helplessly. The thinking, I have been running away from but it too has been following me up very curiously. The whole scenario got changed when I received a call from my friend Vikas informing me about the list which have been uploaded by Punjab Water supply and sewerage Board on their website which includes the names of short listed candidates for SDO post on merit basis. It was an alarming bell for me. I could not react at the particular moment for the reason I was in sleeping mode. But next day when I realized that I have been short listed and have been invited by the department for document verification, a mixed reaction ran through my mind.
I was happy for the fact that my hard work during college have paid off finally and CGPA earned is getting recognized in some way or the other. On the other hand as I was already in mid way of my MS career and waiting for universities decisions hence was not so excited about the opportunity. I already had invested 9 months and 50,000 bugs in order to get an admission call from some reputed university in United States. Moreover, somewhere down the line I knew that my parents are going to take this decision at some other level as they are obsessed with Government job (that too) in Punjab. I thought, “It’s going to be difficult for me to handle the forthcoming situation.”
As soon as I explained my parents about the list published, they burst into joy and their happiness could not be expressed into words. I was numb. I too faked my consent on the deliberation we had over phone, just to make them feel happy. Some days passed, I started getting results from the universities. Status was 2 reject and one accept. Not bad at all. I was still hopeful for my first choice. I wanted an admission with funding which I had not got it yet. It was the only way in which I could debate with them citing the positives of higher studies and negatives of a job in Punjab.
I was desperately waiting for other universities results and keeping my fingers crossed. In the mean time I started getting calls from my relatives congratulating me. Irony is that “SDO” thing happened by luck and sheer chance and was getting applauded for it but. Then happened another reject and I was shattered as I was expecting a call from no one congratulated me in getting 1300 in GRE through my 5 months of hard work and dedication it. I kind of lost my confidence and could see the forthcoming future. I left it to GOD as normally people do while they are out of options.
“Yesterday is a history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift that’s why it is called present”, are the lines which have inspired me in latest days. I heard those watching “Kung Fu Panda” and felt astonished at its usage which is so simple yet so beautiful. As they, “whatever happens, it happens for a reason.” This was the time last year when I was gearing up to take GRE and today a year later, I find myself at the opposite pole.
In the past three years since my graduation, I have never been serious about my career while I could have used this time in paving my way to future. As a fresher I was satisfied with my first company and was busy doing official work only whole heartedly. But nothing came out fruitful. When I shifted to a new firm, I devoted my time preparing for IES along with company work. That did not work out. In my third year I shifted my job once again and started looking out for MS options which again seems to have disappointed me. Had I restricted myself to one field, I could have created a niche. At this point of time, again I am in dilemma of whether to join SDO or continue my job as a Structural Design Engineer.
Keep Reading to know.
Regards
Parul Goyal
Friday, November 18, 2011
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